When your marriage goes on the rocks, it is only natural to want to fix it. Still, saying it is one thing, actually doing it is another. How do I save my marriage? How can we stay together? These are questions that you never want to find yourself asking, but it happens. It also becomes that much harder if only one of the married partners wants to try to save the marriage. Don’t despair though – there is hope. You just need to think about what you’re missing now.
The first and foremost reason that marriages get rocky is that the husband and wife stop actually listening to each other. You might think that just because you’re already married to each other, you will not be able to leave each other – this kind of thinking causes you to say and do things that your partner might be offended by, yet you don’t think twice about it. Don’t do this. Think of your spouse as you did before you got married. Always remember that although they won’t leave you for another (at least not as quickly as when you are dating), you can grow apart on an emotional level.
One of the best tips to save a marriage is to spend quality time together and to talk and listen to each other. Schedule time for just the two of you. Turn off all your communication devices and hide yourselves away or just sit beside each other. Talk about your problems, your hopes and concerns, and try to understand each other.
Another reason that marriages get in trouble is because you get too used to each other. As such, you might not particularly care about your habits anymore. You might not even greet each other anymore, much less care to go out together. This is definitely going to lead to problems. Sometimes a single unusual activity is all it takes to bring you back together. Maybe make a special date for just the two of you, or some weekend getaway to some exotic location. Then you will feel just how close yet how far you are from each other, and being immersed in an unusual situation will push the two of you back together. In this way, fixing a broken marriage can actually be fun!
Of course, you have to take care of yourself too. Sometimes your dissatisfaction with yourself overflows onto your spouse, leading to critical and tactless remarks that start chipping away at the relationship. You should both take better care of yourselves. You could go to the gym or work out at home, eat more healthful food, and so on. Physical and thus sexual attraction is part of the strength of a marriage.
Lastly, try to make your spouse your number one concern. Sure, you may have kids, but your kids will not benefit from you ignoring your spouse in their favor all the time. Women especially tend to favor their kids over their spouses – completely natural, but men do not instinctively behave the same way. Just give more time and energy to your spouse, and it may be enough.
Again, how do you fix a marriage? It will come naturally if you rekindle interest in each other and re-forge your bonds. Good luck, and please take criticisms in stride.
