A few days ago, I was browsing a forum and one thread caught my attention while I was ready to close the browser. The thread title was “Why do guys only want sex from me?” This is a really harsh statement. So I clicked that thread to see what was discussed.
The thread was posted by a heartbroken woman who probably was just dumped by her boyfriend. She was telling about all the relationships she had and complaining all guys only want sex from her. I could understand how hard she felt and she could be a little mean to men right after being dumped. If she was the only one saying that, I would just shut my mouth up.
What made me decide to write this post was there were other women responding her thread with the same opinion. Maybe those women have similar experience so they carry the same belief, but this is very misleading.
OK, here is my answer from a man’s point of view.
First, let me be honest about this question. “Do guys want to have sex with women?”
Yes, of course. Sex life is great and guys just couldn’t stop loving it. I haven’t met any guy who doesn’t want sex with the women he is attracted. And I would say if a guy doesn’t want sex from his loved ones, there’s something wrong.
“Do men only want sex from women?”
My answer to this question is “Half yes and half no”.
Why yes? I don’t deny there are men only look for sex from women. I have seen people around are like that kind of guy.
Why no? Because not all men are only looking for sex from a relationship. According to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, the first need for human is physiological needs, then Security Needs, Social Needs, Esteem needs and Self-actualizing Needs. Once a need is achieved, we’re motivated by the next need.
In a relationship, sex is at the very basic level of physiological needs. If a guy is looking for a serious relationship, he is for sure looking for more than just sex.
If you don’t want guys come to you just for sex I would give you the following suggestion as a guy.
Don’t only focus on your appearance. As a woman, you should make yourself look beautiful. We love beautiful women, but beauty if not only made of appearance. Men are visual animals, we might look at appearance first, but we don’t want a “dumb-blonde” partner.
Men want a partner who is interesting and have things to share. When we’re together, we have lots of things to enjoy beside sex.
If you’re only sexually attractive to him and sex is the only thing you can enjoy together. You both can feel the emptiness need to be filled after sex. What keeps a relationship continuously growing stronger is you both strength the quality you’re attracted to each other. If sex is the only thing to attract a man, he is likely to pull away once he gets it.
You might wonder how you can determine if a man only want sex from you. Unfortunately, I don’t have the absolute rule for you, but what I can suggest is to look for more areas you have in common and can enjoy. Learn from your breakups, each breakup is a new chance for you to love someone who’s just better.